Remembering My Aunt Ellen

A few years ago I was at a party at an artist's house.  This artist friend of mine has friends from all walks of life, and I find pretty much all of them very interesting.

This particular party had fellow artists, a preacher, a local TV personality, business people, etc. and one professional psychic.

Yes.  You read that correctly.

This psychic came up to me, introduced herself, and said, "You have a guardian angel."

I replied, "I have many guardian angels."

To that she said, "This one's name is Ellen, and she is always with you."

I said, "I know."

She seemed surprised at my answers, but I was not in the least surprised by her remarks.  My Aunt Ellen would, of course, be watching over me.  I'm sure she watches over all her nieces, nephews, children, and odd neighborhood kids she knew.  Aunt Ellen was like that.

Aunt Ellen was one of Mama's younger sisters.  Every summer my Mama would send me to Aunt Ellen's house to stay for a week.  I'd also usually spend a week at my Aunt Vernie's house and another week at my Aunt Beadie's house and sometimes even a week at Uncle Bob's, but those are other stories.  Today I'm remembering Aunt Ellen.

Aunt Ellen had a husband named Uncle Bud, but his real name was Ellie.  He worked at a service station back when service stations had attendants to pump your gas, wash your windshield, and check your oil, etc.  I was grown before I even heard of anyone pumping their own gas.  It was a different world back then.

Uncle Bud and Aunt Ellen seemed to me like opposites.  

Aunt Ellen loved to talk.  She was very friendly and would tell you all kinds of stories. She never met a stranger.  She would talk loud and laugh often.  

Uncle Bud, on the other hand, was shy and quiet.  He didn't seem to know that many people, but the ones he did know all respected him and valued his opinions.  He was so soft spoken that you needed to be very near him to hear what he said, and since he almost never talked, you'd want to hear because it would probably be something important to know. 

I guess opposites really do attract because those two really loved one another.

Aunt Ellen and Uncle Bud had an older son named Dean, and three children younger than me, Kay, Raymond, and Darryl.  Aunt Ellen's children were always nice to me, and I almost always enjoyed going to her house.

She loved to cook.  Aunt Ellen peeled her tomatoes and did not peel her cucumbers, which I always thought was odd because Mama, her sister, peeled her cucumbers and not her tomatoes.  Aunt Ellen always put salt, pepper, and sugar on her tomato sandwiches.  Mama never put sugar on hers.

I always found it interesting that sisters could cook so differently.

Mama and Aunt Ellen were different in so many ways.  

Mama was tall and thin most of her life except for her 50s and early 60s when she gained nearly 100 pounds, which all promptly disappeared after she retired. 

Aunt Ellen was always a larger woman, whose natural curves would put Dolly Parton to shame.

Both women were extremely attractive in their own ways, but their marriages seemed very different.  For instance...

• Mama and Daddy were never affectionate in public.  They never even kissed in front of us children.  They were very private people in that way.  
•  In contrast, Aunt Ellen and Uncle Bud were very affectionate to one another.  They kissed good-bye and said, "I love you," right in front of us!

I LOVED that Aunt Ellen and Uncle Bud loved each other so much and showed it.  I will never forget the night I was spending the night at Aunt Ellen's house when Uncle Bud came home from work hurt. One of his hands was all bandaged up because he had accidentally cut off one of his fingers!  They had re-attached the finger at the hospital and sent him home.  Aunt Ellen was so upset.  I felt sorry for her.  Uncle Bud was hurt very badly, but I remember he comforted Aunt Ellen that night.  He didn't want her to be upset or worry about him.  Such was their relationship.

When Aunt Ellen was in her 50s and just turned 60, she had headaches. She also had breathing and other health problems.  She went to a lot of doctors over those years who told her there was nothing wrong. Then one day her face started to swell.  The whole right side of her face was swollen, so the doctors couldn't ignore her anymore. When they took her seriously enough to do some x-rays, they found the cancer.

Yes.  It turns out she had cancer.  By the time they found it, it was too late.  The doctors gave her three months to live, which was about how long she lasted after the diagnosis.  She was 60 when she passed away in September of 1982.  I miss her so much.

Uncle Bud was lost without Aunt Ellen.  He only lived a few more years.  The grief weighed heavy on him.  He never got over losing her.

The last time I visited the little town where they lived, I rode by their old house.  It hurt my heart to see it after all these years.  It felt so empty without Aunt Ellen and Uncle Bud inside, even though it looked like someone did live there.  The house itself looked like it had shrunk.  Originally it was just a little four room house with a bathroom, but they built onto it when their children grew older and they needed more room.  Even with the addition it looked tiny to me that day. The yard that once seemed so big, was just a little patch of land with a fence around it.  The whole neighborhood looked like it had fallen into disrepair. It made me sad to see it.

I prefer to remember the little house like it was when I was young.  Full of the smell of good food and the love of good people. I like to remember going up to that front door and having it opened by a woman with a quick smile and a big laugh.  She was always glad to see me.  I loved those visits.

Yes.  I do have a guardian angel named Ellen.  The psychic was right.  I also have many other guardian angels.  I love and miss them all, and I'll tell you about them by and by.  Stay tuned.

Aunt Ellen and Uncle Bud in his WWII Uniform